Our Inspired Journey

I was chatting with a fellow blogging friend today about how refreshing it is when bloggers (and people for that matter) "keep it real."

Amidst the times we want to remember and record are also times we'd rather not write about, and actually hope to forget...things that make us squirm in our chair while telling our closest friends rather than wanting them broadcast to the whole world.  Since I started writing this blog 3.5 years ago...one of the things I've marveled at is the way God has used my brokenness in beautiful ways for His glory.

It may not be as shocking to you, but it is still fascinating to me.  While in Illinois, whenever I wrote candidly about a "foggy time" I was experiencing...you know, the kind of day like this one when nothing seems to go right no matter how hard you try...I'd always receive more response from those posts, than after sharing the memories I'd gladly frame on the wall as perfect snapshots of days gone by.
We all need to know we're not alone in our struggles.


So here I am again, needing to share with you about a broken place.  Not really because I even want to, but because I believe HE wants me to...because by keeping it hidden, I give the enemy a foothold in my life and in the life of someone who needs to hear that if this is their struggle too...they are not alone, and there is HOPE beyond it.

As I look back over the course of my life, there are marked times I can remember when I struggled to see out of a darkness that seemed to fold in around me...this darkness would tuck me up so tightly that there were times I lost all desire for the truth I knew made up the fabric of my being.  I'm talking about depression.  Just writing the word makes my Spirit stand at attention and prepare for battle, because we both know what an ugly road it's taken us down a season or two.  Regardless of your circumstance or reason, if you've experienced it, you know that depression is a very powerful tool of the enemy to try and isolate us from people and everything life-giving and TRUE about our God.

I know those who have dealt with it, have a variety of testimonies about the "cause."  I have to be very intentional in saying that I am NOT a doctor (shocker) nor have I ever visited one for this reason, not to say you shouldn't...that's just my story.  I'm just a girl who feels called to share my journey through my darkness so that you can know the author of my "treatment plan."

A few months ago, these seasons of darkness started to show up again after about a year long hiatus.  Ugly, dark and very isolating.  You need to hear this...regardless of what doctors may say is the cause, (because I could think of a few physiological reasons for mine at the time...) This is a list of LIES the enemy wants you to believe:

LIES...
1. There is something wrong with you.
2. You are alone.
3. You should be embarrassed...you are the only one who struggles.
4.  No one else will understand, so keep it a secret.
5.  No one really cares about you anyway.
6.  You would be a burden to others if they knew.

The reason I know the enemy says these things to those of us struggling with depression because of difficult circumstances we are dealing with or because of physiological imbalances...is because he's said them to me.  When I shared with a few close friends a few months back, I was amazed at the way they responded...many of them were feeling similar feelings, and also felt alone in their struggles.  It was only after sharing with each other, we began to realize the TRUTH!

TRUTH IN CHRIST...
1.  There is HOPE for you.
2.  You are NOT alone.
3.  You have nothing to be embarrassed of...you are NOT the only one who struggles.
4.  MANY will understand, so SHARE with those you're close to.
5.  MANY people and an AMAZING GOD are crazy about you.
6.  The only time you're a burden is when you let the enemy have his way.  He wants you to think if you "stay out of everyone's way" it'll be easier for everyone, but when you agree to live in captivity and not live out of the LIFE God has for you, no one wins!  Galatians 6:2 says to bear one another's burdens and thereby fulfill the law of Christ!  When we share our burdens we give others a chance to walk in Jesus' footsteps and love...

This is an important post.  For me and for you.  Whether or not you deal with depression, there is something you deal with, and chances are, you struggle with isolating thoughts from time to time.  The only way I know this--without sitting down with each of you over coffee-- is because the enemy of God is out to seek, kill and destroy us.  It's much easier to hit a target who is alone in isolation than one who is surrounded by those who know and speak the WORD of God in times when our foundation is less than stable.  Not only do we need to be a part of a body of believers who we are accountable to in very deep and honest ways, but we need to surround our mind and fill our thoughts with TRUTH.

Here's the part I want to shout from the mountain tops...


For the same reason I'll show the video of Cole's first day of hearing over and over until my time on earth is done, I'll share about GOD's hand of healing in my brokenness...

Since I started my morning routine of waking up early to clothe my mind and remind my spirit of where my help comes from, I've not been sent into a downward spiral since!  Oh sure, there are tough days...moments when all the kids are crying, while we're late trying to get out the door somewhere and I feel less than cheery, but since I've started painting the walls of my mind with HIS thoughts about me as the sun rises over my day, the living, breathing Word of God actually stirs in me hope and purpose before I have time to let my thoughts go elsewhere...God has met me in my brokenness and spoken over me... "though the sorrow may last for a night my JOY comes in the morning!"  He's written to us regarding the guarding of our minds and I've decided to take Him seriously!